It's a plot.

Addie plays violin in the school district junior high symphony orchestra. They have a simple uniform: white top, black bottom, look nice. Until recently, she has been content to wear a short sleeved white t-shirt (which she thought was a little low-cut) over a long sleeved white t-shirt that had a pastel snowflake on the front.

Now she's discovered boys, and one of them sits across from her in the orchestra. She decided it was time to upgrade her top. We went to the fabric store, where she chose the pattern she wanted, and even paid for the fabric herself. Granted, it was on sale at 40% off, but it was still $16. (She wanted me to make the blouse because she is working on goals for home making, and wanted to cut out the material - in case you wonder why we don't just buy a blouse.)

This is the pattern she picked. It can be either a short, short dress, or a tunic. Notice the smooth, flat collar, and the absolute lack of gathers going from the sleeve to the collar.

This is the picture from the pattern instruction. Notice the arrows, pointing to where the collar bits should go. The flat edge should line up with the back, and the front edge should stick out, so that there is overlap for a purely decorative button.

Again, there are no gathers indicated, either in picture or print instructions.

This is the collar piece, with the pattern bits laid on top, to show that I cut them out to the proper size.

And here is the collar, pinned to the blouse.

Notice that the back doesn't line up, and the front doesn't stick out.

Remember, I can't gather all that extra fabric up: the collar join is smooth and flat.

I took this monstrosity, my pattern pieces, and directions to the fabric store where all this had been purchased. There, I was assured that if I simply notched the inner curve of that collar, all would be well. "Each notch will add 1/4 of an inch. You'll be amazed how well it will work."

And I would have been. But it didn't. First of all, no amount of notches will put 7 inches into what is 12 inches of fabric. There is no space-time continuum solution to this problem. So now I'm desperate. I've purchased new fabric and a different pattern. I'll take this crime against innocent homemakers to my genius mother, and see if she can create a pattern piece that will fit the neck of the blouse as it is actually cut to be.

I think that this kind of deceptive direction, along with the price of fabric and patterns, and the determined kink in my back, is all intended to keep me shopping at Wal-Mart, instead of doing it myself.